2020, you are a strange being.

I was pretty quiet on here during Corona, we all know this. A lot of things went into this.

1) I was essential & working; I did not have much time. I talked about this here.

2) The free time I did have was occupied with many things, including my (1 & only!) bathroom total gut job remodel (details coming soon) & much much journaling. MUCH. & I feel wonderful about this return to my 1st love. I’ll be writing more about this on-going. I have been able to deal with many issues.

3) During all the issues, I felt so….wrong talking about my normal blogging topics. No one was spending money. I certainly wasn’t, even despite still working. I wasn’t having much fun to report about. No super-good frugal deals to report on (nor should money be frivolously spent). With my current job situation, I have to be very careful of financial advice publically given. My quarantine fashion merely consisted of yoga pants & flip flops.

4) As time went on I did want to allow other voices to have their space.

5) As time went on I became very emotional about some blogger/influencer situations & I wasn’t sure how to react.

I felt such hypocrisy in Rachel & Dave Hollis’ divorce, Erin Condren, & Myka Stauffer. I have wrestled deeply with this.

What did it mean for bloggers? In my heart, can I be a part of this influencer culture? What does it MEAN to be an ambassador in this social & media space? & now I have all the more realized that I have just even MORE responsibility to be truthful in all writing & in my daily life. I have a purpose & mission in my life & writing & I will NEVER steer away from that or be enticed by earthly things.

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This past weekend I was walking along the beach of Lake Huron in Alpena. As I walked along the morning waves at the edge of the shoreline, I was struck by “the circle of life”. Lion King is an absolute favorite of mine & I feel strongly about the concept & that song. I saw the fine-textured & soft sand on my right. Right under my feet were rougher bits of shells, rocks & who knows what else. Bigger chunks but still small.

I realized that eventually, those chunkier chunks of carbon would evolve to be the fine & soft grains on my right. With the beats of footprints & waves the edges will come to be smaller & smaller & smoother. They probably already HAVE–coming from larger rocks & shells & bones & other organic matter.

& I can’t help but to wonder—Perhaps this tumultuous 2020 is our time to evolve & be smoothed.

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Lake Huron, MI

Written by Bonny Buckner